Black Tights Drama

I am a bit religious about black tights (I wrote about them before in this post, How to get Black Tights Right).  I adore them.  I weep at the passing of winter, because warm weather means I’ll have to bare my chalky white legs again.  As I mentioned in my previous post on black tights, many is the winter morning that I stand in front of my closet with my essentials on: bra, undies, and black tights, deciding what to wear on top of my winter undergarment trifecta.

Tights are to my body what foundation is to my face.  Like all good foundations, they accent the positive and cover up the negative.  My go-to tights for the last few years are the Wolford Satin Deluxe.  Let me tell you why.  First, they have a seam on the back of the legs… a detail which is retro, glamorous, and sexy in a very elegant way.  Second, they are as black as wet coal… not a half-hearted, washed-out black.  Third, and most importantly, they are SHINY.  Shiny in the way that a panther is shiny.  The shiny bit is important, because aside from making them a little special, it also means they’re slippery, so your clothes just slither over you instead of clinging where you don’t want them to.

All three pairs of my son’s shoes have damn velcro fastenings on them, and like a heat seeking missile, the velcro aims for my fancy tights and absolutely destroys them… usually in the mornings while I am trying to wrestle him into a school uniform.  Last winter, I had three pairs of these Satin de Luxe tights of perfection, and they were all decimated by his velcro fastenings.   Prior to velcro being a daily part of my life, I’d get 2 or 3 years out of these tights, easily.   As soon as he learns how to tie shoes with actual laces, I’ll get longevity out of my hosiery once again.

A few weeks ago, when I was shopping in Selfridges with my blog pal, Mithra, of The Bubble Joy (she was visiting London), we popped into the Wolford hosiery section to re-stock my supply of Satin De Luxe tights.  They were sold out in all sizes except for Extra Small, which I clearly am not!  A few days later, I went to the Wolford store in Westfield. They were also sold out.  Apparently (so I was told), there was a glitch in the supply of these from Austria this year.  I stopped by the Wolford store on Marylebone High Street.  Sold out.  Dizzy with this-can’t-be-happening panic and velcro-anger, I phoned the other Wolford Stores in London. ALL. SOLD. OUT.  Even the Wolford website is sold out; how is this possible?  This may not be a crisis for you, but there are times I wear black tights for 7 days in a row (not the same pair, obviously), and yes I have the fantastic matte ones I mentioned in my other post, and that I wore in my previous post with the leopard skirt… but I need my shiny, slithery, panthery, foundationy ones.

I did what any sensible person would do.  I came home and googled my beloved Wolford Satin Deluxe tights (surely SOMEONE must have a pair gathering dust in a drawer somewhere on this planet?) and guess who has them fully stocked in every size?  Amazon!  They’re the same price as Wolford sells them for, which unfortunately, is a lot.  Tights, like shoes, are one of those items that you really get what you pay for.  If you scrimp on them, they don’t wash well, they don’t last, they don’t retain their colour or shape, and they go sheer in all the wrong places.  If you need some perfect tights in your life, these are them.  Mine arrived in the post yesterday.  I’m so thrilled to have them again that I went all Peaches & Herb and sang, ‘Reunited and it feels SO GOOD!  Reunited and it’s understood, There’s one perfect fit, And sugar, this one is it…’   Perfect shiny, slithery, panthery, tights are linked below.  You’ll thank me if you’ve never tried these before:

Here they are on Amazon in the US

AND here they are in the UK

Sadly, not my legs in this photo, but look at the fabric!

Linking to: notdeadyetstyle, notdressedaslamb, fashionshouldbefun